Liquid Egg Product
The Shawn Bradley of Weblogs
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
-- Groucho Marx

Breast milk happens to be a useful tool

If you’re like most people, you’ve probably thought to yourself, “Hey, I wonder when Liquid Egg Product is going to get us some good breast milk stories.” Well, today’s your lucky day…

Breast milk can be used as a cheese: The couple has further plans to create a gelato.

Breast milk can repel the opposite gender: And considering the number of caddish males, this could prove rather useful.

Breast milk can be used as a weapon: This is probably how Saddam Hussein was planning to use biological weapons

Breast milk can earn you a pink slip: We give cow’s milk to babies. Is a baby accidentally getting another mother’s milk really that frightening?

March 9th, 2010 1 comment
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Patently Ineffective, Uncomfortability

32E

Compared to most Americans, I’m pretty sanguine when it comes to minor inconveniences. Like being assigned a center seat on an airplane. There are a couple thoughts that run through my mind when this happens:

1. My chances are doubled I’ll sit next to a cute, single girl. (And after my two prior failures following up with girls I’ve gotten numbers for, it stands to reason the third time will be the charm.)

2. My chances are doubled I’ll sit next to someone who needs to take some of my seat space.*

This time around, my neighbors were a portly old man and an old woman playing sudoku. Neither had to use any of my seat space.

I suppose we can call that a draw.

* I don’t put very much blame on the airlines or the big and tall for seat overflow situations, but that’s a discussion for another time.

March 8th, 2010 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Grilled Cheese

Feel like Zeus

feel like zeus

I tried this stuff. I still don’t feel like Zeus. Or, if I do feel like him, being the king of gods is seriously overrated.

The tea isn’t bad, however.

March 7th, 2010 8 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Bad Ads, Snake Oil

Liquid Egg Product is now 11% more web-savvy

For those of you who can’t get enough of me:

An actual Twitter account: http://twitter.com/LiquidEgg

An actual Facebook account: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?ref=profile&id=1154624499

March 6th, 2010 2 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Random

Shah Mat: The King is Helpless

Dabbling in rendering again. Click the image for full-size.

Shah Mat

March 5th, 2010 1 comment
Posted by Donnie Filed under CG, Chess

Black History Month backfire

Celebrating Black History Month doesn’t work as well when you encourage elementary school students to celebrate O.J. Simpson, Dennis Rodman, and RuPaul.

3 L.A. teachers suspended over Black History Month celebration

March 4th, 2010 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Patently Ineffective

I don’t look any different shirtless yet

So it’s been four months. I don’t look any different shirtless yet…I think. (Follow-up on “Here’s your chance to see me shirtless”)

For a few weeks after that post, I was fairly good about keeping up the workout regimen, but completely faltered in December and January. And if you’re not in good shape, it’s very easy to lose any gains you’ve made. It’s much easier for an elite athlete to pickup after a few months of not training; for Mr. Sedentary, he’s essentially starting over.

Now in February, I was very consistent in keeping to the regimen (I wonder why?) so that’s good. But instead of having four months of workouts like I should, I essentially have one.

The great thing is that I am noticing strength gains. After starting the bench press with a 10 pound weight on each side, today I will use 25. Instead of struggling to complete 1 rep of 12 crunches, I can get through 2 reps. Similar with the 90 pound deadlift (I would have started lighter with the deadlift, but they have no dumbbells between 25 and 45 pounds. So that meant the next lighter level would have been 50 pounds…way too light)

Cardiovascularly, I don’t feel I’ve made any significant improvement. Recently, I discovered something called interval training. The plan is to stress the body as much as possible for 4 minutes, then 4 minutes of rest. The theory is that the body will change faster by being pushed to the limit for short periods of time, rather than not being pushed to its limit for long periods of time. We’ll see.

My weight’s oscillated between 152 – 160 pounds over the past month, currently at 152. My high school weight was 130, but I don’t really want to go back to it. Sworn Enemy’s parents saw me for the first time since high school on Sunday, and commented that I looked “healthy” now.

March 2nd, 2010 8 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Grilled Cheese

Epic Beard Man

A popular video that I didn’t stumble upon two years after everyone else has already seen it!

The content of the video is not suitable for minors (blood, Epic Beard Man’s shirt), but it’s not like minors visit this site anyway.

February 25th, 2010 5 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Entertainment, Patently Ineffective, Uncomfortability

?????????????????????????????

What the deuce is this? Is this supposed to make me want to go to Burger King?

(Note that I haven’t seen this on TV, so I don’t even know if it’s real…but it’s VERY well-made if it’s a fake.)

February 24th, 2010 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Bad Ads

A night of legends

(If you wish to watch the whole thing, the entire Mafia vs Ninja playlist)

What would be the perfect Bad Movie Night? For me, I’d be happy with 3 of the following. Let me know your suggestions!
Q: Did I forget any of our favorites?

The night is incomplete without at least one of these four:

Troll 2
Sakura Killers
Sinbad of the Seven Seas (the Lou Ferrigno one)
Mafia vs. Ninja

Unfortunately, these aren’t common finds, although Troll 2 has gained a slight degree of fame (it’s on iTunes).

Other Legends

Leonard, Part 6
Gymkata
Kung Fu vs. Yoga
Santa With Muscles

I don’t find these legendarily bad (but they are bad and many others consider them legendary)

Howard the Duck
Plan 9 From Outer Space

I’ve never been able to watch the entire thing. (Girls and/or alcohol may give me the necessary fortitude to complete watching them, although that is not a guarantee.)

Hootch County Boys, aka the Great Lester Boggs. (I have tried to watch this movie at least 3 times, and never got more than halfway through. I don’t how Q did it.)
Baby Geniuses 2

February 23rd, 2010 14 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Bad Movie Night

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